Shepherd the Flock

Matthew 5:42: “Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.”

Recently, I had a rather interesting confrontation with a man who was begging money. Thinking about the confrontation, and how things went sour, I am saddened that I cannot go back and do things over again. I’m not sure I handled the situation correctly, though I admit I’m not quite sure, and this post today is an attempt to explore the situation for future improvement.

I’ve run into beggars many times before, having grown up near downtown Atlanta, and I’ve even had some good conversations with beggars while street-preaching and witnessing. But this incident was fairly unique…and somewhat frightening.

I was in Los Angeles, CA., about to hop a plane home from the Shepherds’ Conference. I had a rental car to turn in, a flight to catch, and I was in a hurry –not to mention exhausted. Near the airport, in a relatively poor section of town, I had just stopped to top off the gas tank before I turned in the rental car. As I get out of the car and move towards the pump, I immediately see a poor looking black man approaching fast and yelling ‘Sir!, Sir!’. Looking back, the expression on my face when I realized he was talking to me probably tipped him off that I was not thrilled with being confronted.

The man was missing most of his teeth, and he spewed a visible amount of spit when speaking loudly. I look toward him and say ‘yes?’, and as he goes into his story, I proceed to divert my attention to the gas pump –trying to non-verbally communicate that I was in a hurry and wanted nothing to do with him.

Well, this man claimed that it was his first day on a new job, and that his truck (pointing across the street at a barely visible pickup) had run out of gas. Thus, he said “I’m bumming gas for just the second time in my life. Can you help me out?” he asked. Now I’m no rocket scientist, but I was not inclined to believe one word he said. Nevertheless, regardless of his story or even what he looks like, I’m usually not inclined to open my wallet to a total stranger –especially given the area of town I was in and the possibility of robbery. Besides, I had no cash, and was pressed for time.

So I looked at him and rather nicely said ‘I’m sorry, I can’t help you’, and then turned my full attention back to the gas pump, thinking that he would just move on. Well, he wasn’t satisfied with this answer, and he began to press me further. So again, I politely turned and said ‘I’m in a hurry; I have a plane to catch a rental car to turn in. I’m sorry, but I cannot help you out.’ And again, he was not detoured, and he proceeds to ask my why it is that I cannot help him. He was talking so fast that I didn’t catch it all, but I immediately turned around when he did say ‘why can’t you help me; is it against your principles?’

Something inside of me clicked when he said this, and immediately the gospel and all the teaching I had learned that week came to mind. ‘Against my principles?’ –Most certainly not!, I thought to myself. But things were going south fast; the man was agitated at this point, not stopping with this comment, and he kept on talking louder and louder as I contemplated what to say. I finally interrupted and said: ‘No, it’s not against my principles. I have no cash on me, and I am in a hurry to catch a plane. I have to get gas, turn in the rental, and take a shuttle to the airport. I’m sorry, I cannot help you’. Looking back, I had such a perfect opportunity at this point to share the gospel, and it saddens me that I didn’t.

‘Well, there’s and ATM right there’, he then replied, pointing inside the gas station. Wouldn’t you know he say such a thing, huh? Again, I told him that I was sorry, but I couldn’t help him. At this point he lunged toward me, got right in my face, and started screaming: “You CAN’T help me, or you won’t help me?” Well, by now I was a little freaked-out, and I certainly wanted to diffuse the situation, so I said: “You’re right, I won’t help you. I was simply trying to be nice by saying can’t.”

He yelled back ‘thank you’ at the top of his lungs, and then went on about he hates ’stupid, rich, white people who are always just trying to be nice instead of honest’. I stood in amazement, as he was still up in my face, clearly shocked at his diatribe. He went on to say that he wasn’t a racist, but white people would never help him, etc.

Nevertheless, when his insults to me didn’t rouse me to anger, just some head-shaking on my part, he turned and walked away –and yelled ‘have a nice flight’ rather sarcastically.

This incident has bothered me all week. Not only because I wish I could do it over, but because even if I had to do it over, I don’t know what I’d say/do differently! Honestly, I didn’t have any money to give him –there’s a reason why my entire trip to the conference was fronted by another. Looking back, maybe I could have said something like “silver or gold I do not have, but what I do have I give you…”, like Peter and John in Acts 3.

When Jesus says to give to those who ask, does he mean even to those who are begging money for drugs? Even to those who lie to garner sympathy so they can swindle you? Even to those who are lazy and will not work for themselves? Even in situations when you are in danger of robbery or physical harm? Even to those who seek to take advantage of your wealth? Even to those who you don’t know and will never see again?

I sometimes struggle with this verse and this situation, because I have run into so many beggars. I’d be interested in some of your thoughts.